HAPPY HALLOWEEN

Do you know where your Halloween candy, treats and costumes were made?

The gummy worms, eyeballs, mice, etc. that my mom is giving out are made in China. The pretzels are made in PA and the chocolate I already ate, so too bad for the goblins that come our way.

My "treat" is to be stuck in class all night wearing a Halloween shirt from Old Navy which was probably made in El Salvador and a pair of kick ass calf-high patent leather black spider web boots. I don't know where they were made, but I bought them at a thrift shop in Chicago last Halloween so they are safe.

I'm going to look hot for my "made in PA" presentation tonight!

If you have any leftover chocolate candy that is not made in China, please feel free to send it my way.

Candy Bras

Last month my sister and I went to an adult store in Maine. This may be too much information for some people, but I don't see the big deal, besides, if this is too much information, you've probably skipped a lot of my blog altogether!

At any rate, I rarely say anything positive about my miserable existence in Chicago, BUT, that frozen tundra has terrific adult stores (my favorites include Tulip and The Pleasure Chest, if you are curious.)

Condom Sense has a catchy name, an ok website, and a fabulous location on the cobbled streets of Portland, Maine. They even have a few items made in America, such as the edible, glow in the dark body paint. I was even tempted to replace my long mourned Silver Bullet with a knock -off version that failed to list where it was made (Alas, however, the knock-off versions were missing some key features of the real Silver Bullet and remained in the store).

What most intrigued me about the experience though, aside from the lone salesperson who refused to get off the phone and assist curious, spend happy customers, were the candy bras and underwear.

I've seen these items before our boycott and never purchased them, for practical reasons, of course...they don't look the slightest bit comfortable. If you've never seen a candy bra before, imagine the colorful, Cheerio like candy bracelets you'd get as a kid, the kind on a flimsy string which would sometimes get caught between your teeth as you'd try to bite off your favorite sugary sweet color first. Unfortunately doing this usually resulted in you biting the crappy yellow "bead" next to the one you wanted while simultaneously creating a huge pool of drool careening down your chin and wrist.

Now imagine that same concept turned into a "bra" and, or underwear. Hot huh?

Good thing they are made in China and had to stay in the store. It saved me from trying to think of reasons why pools of sticky drool in "delicate places" were not a good idea! Monistat might like the end result, but I wouldn't!